sometimes I hate my male friends

I'm having a pretty good week.. I just got a job at a dating service doing direct marketing calls to people who've expressed interest in our programs. I also learned that my scholarship is being increased due to my impressive GPA improvements in the last year, which is also great. And I got to qualify for the Higher Score Guarantee at Kaplan, meaning I can take the LSAT class again for free.

But despite all these good things, there's still one thing nagging me: Joe.

I'm really not in the mood for I-told-you-sos about him right now, so spare me. The thing is, though, I sent a really long email last night detailing how things were going with me. It was really an excuse for a ramble, and I think I'm totally pre-menstrual as well. So it was long.. it wasn't sweet or anything, but it was honest. With him, sometimes it feels like the friendship is halfhearted. I wish I could just totally ignore him as easily as he can do so to me. Okay, that's total bullshit--I wish that he would pay attention to me as much as he does his other friendships. I don't want just to be some back-up girl because that's not who I am. It made me sad to come on after not talking to him since yesterday morning when he blew me off.

I sound horribly pitiful. See, these are the reasons I tell him to go fuck himself.

Anyways.. I've been feeling pretty decent otherwise with my whole running and painting hobbies. I haven't painted in the past couple of days though so I should get started on that tonight. So.. I'm off. later.